Did you know that nearly half of all women report having at least one sexual function problem — low libido, disturbance of arousal, difficulty orgasming, or painful intercourse?
Probably not, since it’s not something you talk about a lot.
When Lyndsey Harper, MD, first started practicing as an ob-gyn, she saw many women complain of problems in the bedroom—most commonly what they perceived as low libido. But despite her medical school, Harper was never taught how to deal with these problems. They never talked about this in medical school.
What is libido?
Your libido is your desire or appetite for sex. Some sex therapists and doctors who specialize in sexual health talk about two different kinds of libido: spontaneous and responsive.
The spontaneous kind just…uh…spontaneously. It could be the sex drive that people associate with hormonal teens and 20-somethings. Sudden cravings for sex seem to be out of nowhere. You know…feeling horny.
In spontaneous desire, first you think, “I want sex,” and then you take action to make it happen (whether it’s opening a dating app and looking for someone new, making a phone call at 3 a.m., or partner takes action next to you on the couch), and then, when you find that person, you’re awakened. So it’s the desire for sex, then the seeking of sex, then being aroused.
Some women stop having the desire in their teens and twenties. Some women feel no spontaneous desire at all. They’ll only feel the other kind: reactive desire.
This desire, as the name suggests, arises in response to some external stimulus. It happens when you get turned on while reading an erotic story or watching a sexy movie or feeling the touch of someone you are sexually attracted to. In this one, it’s arousal first, then the desire for sex and the pursuit of it.
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Post time: Mar-02-2023